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05/01/2003 - 06/01/2003 06/01/2003 - 07/01/2003 07/01/2003 - 08/01/2003 08/01/2003 - 09/01/2003 09/01/2003 - 10/01/2003 10/01/2003 - 11/01/2003 11/01/2003 - 12/01/2003 12/01/2003 - 01/01/2004 01/01/2004 - 02/01/2004 02/01/2004 - 03/01/2004 03/01/2004 - 04/01/2004 04/01/2004 - 05/01/2004 05/01/2004 - 06/01/2004 06/01/2004 - 07/01/2004 07/01/2004 - 08/01/2004 08/01/2004 - 09/01/2004 09/01/2004 - 10/01/2004 10/01/2004 - 11/01/2004 11/01/2004 - 12/01/2004 12/01/2004 - 01/01/2005 01/01/2005 - 02/01/2005 06/01/2005 - 07/01/2005 Saturday, August 30, 2003
something feels strange.
i have a slight sore throat, i feel reallly hot, but i don't have a fever..and..i feel sick..but i don't think i am. i have a running nose, that occasionally becomes a stuffed nose.
everyone's falling sick. it's either a virus. or it's cos everyone's stressed. i hate being sick..it probably means there's something bothering me. that's stressing me out..or making me uncomfortable or something. i hate this feeling! i hate it.
i saw so many nice clothes today. wish i had the money. i've been spending money like like like...like a lot. this is not good. i've brought it down by like..more than hundred in a few days. but i need to collect money from odac official funds and class funds esp. broke.broke.broke.
oh well. i have real run tmr. hope it's okay. long day agn.
ever get sick of life?..
yeah bio was bad.
great. my brother just got sent home from army. cos he's infected with chicken pox. !!!.. wad am I supposed to do? I'VE never had chicken pox. oh no. i don't want to get chicken pox this week. i don't mind getting it..but just not before the end of friday. cos friday's such a busy day. airport, jen's birthday and e play. how..
and i lay there thinking, if the world were to stop spinning, would we ever stop loving?
trigoooo is driving me upppp the wallllll...trigoooo is drivinnnngg me outta my minddd..trigo is MADNESS. woohoo.
guess what. i slept at 11, and woke up at close to 1. that's how much sleep i owe myself. and i only woke up cos the phone rang. so much for waking up at 10.
sikkimsikkimsikkim!..i cant' wait. i can't wait. i can't wait.. i hope everyone can go..i want everyone to go. weeeee..
long day today. nice day today.
i wanted to blog tonight. but i don't know wad i want to say. i can't write it down in words. i don't even know wad it is. i wish i knew myself better. i think there are pple out there who know parts of me better than i know myself. come to think about it..perhaps not.
woooohoooo (: nice day today was. tho i felt like a specimen half the time cos of all the cameras. eee. nvm, let's skip that part. anyway i just came home from a haircut. it's..shorter than the last haircut, but feels better than it did 2 hours ago.
wow my brother passed his driving test!..woohoo!.. this is great. altho he's gonna go army this week. so..kinda defeats the purpose..but..wellllll..
i forgot! dawyl's tag reminded me.
my brother's taking his driving test tmr. -hope he passes- ahem then y'noe wad thattt means. ahha. one more driver in the hse!..everyone but me will know how to drive!..hence, the public transport's gonna lose out from my familY.. haha. okay i'm crapping, there's still only one car. oh well.
okay havent blogged in a long time. sigh.
helloooo! i just got home from my grandma's hse! i love my grandma's hse. it's so...like a second home. i know where everything is!..it's like, it's like my own home!..weee. and i feel so comfortable there. yay.
"one cannot solve problem with the same level of knowledge that created them" words of wisdom from my hair buddy -Albert Einstein
jumping jacks. my dad n i just discovered this huge bee comb in this cupboard on the 3rd floor balcony. it's huge. and then like..at first we thought it was just a small bunch of them, cos they kept flying in and out thru this hole. yeah then i wrapped my dad up in cloth and he went out to like spray insecticide into the hole. man..soooo many bees came out!..and like..slowly they accumulated at this side, and they formed like this group of them.. and then! believe it or not, the stupid queen started laying eggs! and the workers started carrying them away!!..these small yellowish oval shaped things. so gross. then my dad wanted to open the cupboard, so i told him to attach string around the knob like thing on the door, and then bring it really really far and pull. yeah and when he pulled a whole lot more of bees came out, and the comb, this yellow abandoned thing could be seen. they were like, these yellowwish banana things huddled together, and its amazing cos the pattern on the comb was.. regular. and so intricate. so amazing. the wonders of nature. now this whole group of them are just surrounding the queen, who can't be seen. there must be hundreds of them. oh well. hope they fly away.
hey kid-o, i wanna say that i'm gonna miss you very vey much. well. i've known yu since pre primary. we were in the same class thruout pri sch, and sec 3 and 4 and now j1. can't imagine how life heres gonna be without yu. i can't help but let my eyes wear themselves out, as i think about all our shared memories. i feel quite dumb cos i never knew months would pass this fast. i never thought about august. the month yu'd leave. but hey, life's just a ship sailing on in time. and i know this is a really good opportunity and i'm very proud of you and happy for you. thruout tonight i thought these were gonna be the last days i'll actually hang around w you in sch and stuff, but hey, yu're not going away forever.
i feel like i can't do anything, that everythings helpless. depression's something you've gotta overcome. it's like. when yu're in depression, yu're literally IN a depression and yu just have to find some way to pull yourself out of it. friends will always be there, offering yu a hand. like..they'll throw you the rescue rope, but yu've gotta use it to climb out, or if yu don't have the strength, yu've gotta tie it round yourself and give your friends the chance to pull yu out.
i'm in the library. decided to blog, since i'm having an extremely longggg break. anyway haha this is hilarious, there are so many odac pple walking around w the same bag. haha. and the red color is like..the most common in med fac. when i start using it (not any time soon, my nike one is STILL in operation) then there'll be like..more than 5 pple w it i think. haha.
and yeah saus, my poor bro..he's like..hit quite badly by e chicken pox. poor kid. he can't eat. and i just went to take a jab..so this means i only have a 10-30% chance of being infected. cos there's a second dosage six weeks from now. oh well..we'll see how it goes. i'm ready to take on everything. hah. germs.
anyway..yeah i owe apologies to pple today. i was thinking about it when i was in the car.. i've been quite selfcentred today..dawyl, sorry for like..not waking up when yu were trying so hard to wake me up..quite irresponsible of me.. and to the girls who were there for the run (tiff, shi hui, melody..)..and some of the guys too, sorry i was complaining so much initially..didnt feel like running..tiff i think yu're right, i was paranoid about being infected w chicken pox.. and to nizam, sorry yu had to wait so long to go home. thanks for waiting. hope yu feel better now.
okay. hope yu pple read this. cos i'm quite sorry.
btw..i think i'm gonna donate blood for the next donation drive. i believe i've overcome the fear of needles.
okay i'm still coming to sch tmr..cos i'm not infected yet. and that means i'm not contagious. no spots, no germs. (apparently..) so i've got to start studying bio soon. since im taking the test tmr. how very interesting. life's never predictable huh. and my bro couldnt have chosen a better time to get chicken pox..just when he enters the army. haha. hilarious kid that boy..
anyway, maths was bad. physics was..okay. and bio (i can predict the future) was.. (or rather, is going to be..) horrible. i can tell. i feeeeeel it in my finnngersss i feeeeel it in my toeeess.
better go now. today was a nice day (: nurie, yu are a rock!..haha. we always have very strange encounters whenever we go out..haha... alright, g'nite all!..
anyway, i'm planning to be visually disruptive during physics test tmr. just for the fun of it. hopefully i remember to bring wad i need. and then yeah. i wonder if i'll do better this time. haa. hope i don't distract pple from doing their paper tho. oh well.
anyway, so i came home today, slept, ate dinner and started maths. i need to do some physics later in prep for tmr's test.., cos i made a bet w kooifei..trying to win her. haha. [i wonder why i tax myself like this..but it's all in the name of "fun" (: sue us, we're strange.. ] so i didnt go for unofficial odac pt. feel a bit guilty, wonder how it went..hope pple did show up. but i was 1. tired 2. needed to mug 3. not in the mood to pt yeah and i prob can list a few more. but i shant..not now..can't htinkkk.
ijat ijat, i better go now. good luck everyone, for your lecture tests. take kare and feel the night!!!
anyway..i'm thinking about getting contacts. cos finally i've realised how irrritating specs can be. but should i?..i so don't want to start poking things into my eyeballs. i'm still thinking about it.
so anyway today's the day i've set aside for mugging. but i guess i'll start in the evening after gilmore only. i love gilmore. rocks.
gtg, meeting my mom..to check out the contacts..may get some trial pack or crap. shall see about it. and think about it some more. cya pple (:
just came back from another never ending long long day. i'm so so so tired, i'm going to sleep so so so early. and wake up so so so early.. (ten?..) and study so so so hard. believe me?..i'll tell you how it goes tmr.
i just realised that there's so much out there in life. i'm only 16. (okok 17 soon. sigh.) and, i feel like, i've lived for so long, and learnt so many new things and gotten to know so many great pple. i'm glad i went to rj. i'm not gonna regret my decision, cos i've gained so much from rj. i don't feel like i've lost out. i don't feel like i've missed much. i still have wad i had. and now i have more.
don't live life with regrets. it only pushes you backwards.
the world cried for you today. may you rest in peace. God bless.
yiling, study hard okay. if you ever read this. honestly, there's so much potential in you. study hard.. i know you can do it. take kare kid. thanks for the advice. yu're a great listener btw.
i've got another long day tmr. no time to mug. no mood to mug tho. but i will. i have to. there's no time already. i guess i better stop deceiving myself into thinking that i can cope and that everything'll be okay in the end, cos the end is near, and things are far from okay. promos. aim: 2S papers. if not, i'm like..sacrificing the chance of a scholarship. 2 S papers. chem?..maths?.. i dunno. do i really want it..can i really cope. i dunnoo. i'll try. and see how. there are limits.
to everyone who's stressed out abuot prelims, about the upcoming promos, it isnt too late to start. everyone of yu have potential..don't waste it. all the best.
and to those who arent in the happiest of moods.. i'm here to help, if you ever need it. take kare of yourselves.
" have you ever wondered why they push you away,
keep you from understanding,
and yet you know they yearn to be understood
i don't think i'll ever understand. "
something's bugging me..ever get that feeling?..it's like an itch that'll never go away. i'm staying up late. and i know that tmr's a long day. why do i do this to myself?..i hate it when pple have to wake me up during lessons. or lectures. it feels so different. i'm still the same person. arent i?..from sec sch?..have i changed.. no. i don't think so. this is me.
GETAGRIPGETAGRIPGETAGRIPGETAGRIP.
i agree w pam. it's not right to blame pissyness or pms-al behaviour on hormones.. and wads even more important is that yu never ever be pissy to your friends for no reason and not apologise to them. that's just pure mean.
its spinning faster than ever..i never thought i'd see the stars..till it shone thru the greyness and i realised, they were mine to keep.
anyhow, today was..a waste..honestly..didnt' learn much in school. only thing worthwhile i did was ipw!!!!! and it's over. we've finished the draft..at last. managed to summarise it..it's exactly 2500. woa man. it's tough to squeeeze so many words into such an unreasonable word limit!
anyway did i tell you i love my family?.. i love them so much. they rock my world. i have no sudden reason to say so, but i just realised today how much i love them all. weee!.. (:
anyway, tmr i'm gonna miss like..2 lectures!..scoofy!..hoowww. okay. i don't really even want to miss them. sighhh.. i'm turning into a leaf!..
and i lay there thinking, there's so much more to life. be free, and let your mind roam, for aint nothing gonna control you.
OUTDOOR WEEK IS HERE (: tmr's gonna be exciting hopefully everything goes smooth!..heck tutorials/lectures, i gotta be there no matter wad. anyway i'm expect all my friends to support odac during outdoor weeek!..ahha. trust me, the stuff we're selling's quite good. and the rockwall climbing's from mon-thurs, 510 to 7. it's gonna be fun!..cya'll there!.. bye (:
anyway so i had an ipw meeting at my hse today, convenient for me, and yeah. basically we realised how hard it was..this whole ipw thing, and how much there was to think about!..manmanman. but my ipw group members are good. makes the proj much better to deal w. can't imagine if i were in another group. i'd want to squish my other groupmates heads in. i'm glad i'm in the group i'm in. basically.
anyway, we divided up the stuff. so i gotta get started on it. must be done by tmr, so that tmr will be minimal editting, simply compilation during ipw meeting. n more touch ups. which reminds me, i should go n get my sch comp password..can't seem to find that slip of paper. woohoo.
jimjangjoo, i havent done a spot of homework. tonight'll be a long night, cos i refuse to go to school all blur. i will do something, so that i wont just be a living lump during tutorials.. n lectures.
btw yesterday was fun. the sentosa thing, tho it was hot, and then dinner. i love my odacians. and i love my ex-classmates. and.. yeah (: i love most pple i know. hahha. okay..gotta scram. take kare kids!..
this week's hectic. and i'm feeling so..so..constricted and irritated w myself. sigh. can't wait for the week to end. but..yeah. how strange, i think i feel this every week.. notgood. sigh. gotta catch up on my work, plus now that i wanna take sats in nov, i gotta start studying soon. woa..the first three months were so great. i'll never forget how it felt..i truly felt carefree, so relaxed. so..free.
now..life's so rushed, there's no time, and i want everyday to last longer, but it wont, yet at the same time i want e whole week to be over. sigh.
i'll never truly appreciate these moments until it's over and i'm stuck in a world of time which's even more scoofed up. get a grip kid.
guess wad, i tried to study chem equilibrium so that i could do the tutorial for tmr, but i took so long. i think my brain's not used to focussing. and my attention span has gone down to like..20 minutes. i can't take this..whywhywhy. helphelphelp. i need a solution. aim of the month, to catch up on my studies. helphelp.
i think the new leaf policy is distracting. i mean, i keep talking about it, and i never actually follow it. but nvm it's like..motivating..green leaf, green leaf.
hey i just realised that my bro's going to army on aug 22..or something like that. that's like..so near!..how come!...why like that!...he's so small! [actually he's not all that small]..(oh no..the hse will be so quiet w/o him..who will i fight w?..howhowhow. i think i'm gonna miss him...)
this month aint gonna be a good one. i don't like august very much. can't wait for september. hmmph. actually let's fastforward to november. bleah.
gotta scram.
and i took photos!..i'll post them up later, for those who wanna see, once i learn how to attach photos.
and to the n's, pity we had to postpone n-day activities today, but nurie, yu must be tired, and my mom's kinda irritated w me, and yeah jen? i think yu're grounded by your mommy right?..so yeah. next week then. loveya'll..
and i love everyone else too. ya'll rock. :)
and after all,
loving is knowing when to let go.
take good kare of yourself nurie.
lovya always kid.
gently spinning out of time.. and life's only beginning..
sitting in darkness isn't the way, cos then noone will understand why yu chose that path. life without friends is like, living without loving. it's empty cold hard pointless lonely and yeah just sucks.
i know yu prob don't need these words, cos i know how much friends mean to yu. but please don't fall behind without letting us save you from the emptiness that's beyond.
same color too.
anyway i took a blu slip yesterday, for pe.. and i CABBED home. so waste money. sigh..now gotta save up. but i was really tired. and yeah. 14 bucks..stupid taxis are so ex. sigh. fell asleep in the taxi. haha. think the uncle had a hard time waking me up when he exited the highway, cos yeah, i just told him like..to take the pie and exit at simei. haha. oh well. yeah.
anyway urban challenge was quite fun la. yeah...an experience. pity we like..didn't rush from the start, then i think we could have like, made a better timing. oh well then. next yr? haha. anyway yeah OUTDOOR WEEK is coming soon, so to everyone out there, yu've gotta support ODAC!.. yeah we'll be selling stuff and holding activities for everyone, so must buy and come down and participate. i guarantee extreeeeeme fun!..haha. (hopefully..aiyar support la. we're selling damn good stuff at very good prices!! haha must come and buy)
okay anyway i gotta go do my wayyyy overdue maths trigo assignment now. due last wed. sigh. so much for green leaf policy BUT i did some filing yesterday. so yeah, i'm so proud of it. haha. when yu see me, just ask me to show yu my orange file! it's like..howwww organised!..woohoooo.
haha gtg, loveya'll.